


Kool Kids Klub||South Park GC

by Pitytheplaingirl



Category: South Park
Genre: Emo!stan (for a bit), F/F, F/M, Jersey!Kyle, M/M, Multi, Slightly femme!Craig, Textchat, You’ll see, its a mess, most of these tags are for a bit honestly, slightly femme!Stan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-11-08 12:33:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17981426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pitytheplaingirl/pseuds/Pitytheplaingirl
Summary: The South Park gang are now in their junior year of high school, and wasting their lives away texting.Doesn’t that just seem perfectly normal?Well, besides all the drama that constantly goes on in their small friend groups.





	1. -ICan’tBelieveit’snotButters! Has Entered the Chat-

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first group text story, so I hope it all goes well, and everyone enjoys!

-Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters! Has entered the chat- 

StanTheMan: Kenny.... Why the fuck did you add him in the chat? 

McLongDick: Stanley.... Why the fuck did you make your name that cringe ass title? 

McDreidel69: Ken, we all know this. Stan is unoriginal. He can’t come up with a good name. 

StanTheMan: Hi! My name is Stan Marsh and this is the time I figured out I was being verbally abused by my boyfriend! 

BigBoned: fucking disgusting! Fags!!

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: now, Eric, I don’t think that’s very nice. 

BigBoned: suck my Bick Butters. 

McLongDick: hey. No. He is only allowed to suck mine. 

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: I can’t suck anyone’s dick or i’ll be grounded. Besides I rather eat Kim Kardashian’s nice ass! 

Xx.Wendy.xX: Butters! You know Kim’s ass is fake! How many times do we have to go over this? 

StanTheMan: I thought she died? 

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: She is not dead!! Nor is her ass fake. Don’t belittle my girlfriend like this!

McLongDick: .... so what you’re saying is, I have to die and get a fake ass for you to love me?  
McLongDick: I already died enough to get that achievement, so now all I need is a fake ass. Bebe! Where did you get your ass?

BebeDarling: my ass isn’t fake! 

Hecan’thearyou: hey! Stop staring at my girl’s ass. 

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: clyde, she isn’t your girl. 

McDreidel: are we all going to ignore the fact that Ken just said that he died enough to fill an achievement? 

StanTheMan: yeah, I mean, he is constantly dying on the inside. Just like me. 

BigBoned: stop being an emo fag. 

McDreidel: stop being such a dick, fatass. 

BigBoned: stop being such a Jewish Ginger. 

McDreidel: you incompetent Whore. 

BigBoned: I’m not a whore. That’s bebe’s title. 

BebeDarling: at least I don’t have to act as if I’m going to kill myself to get attention. 

BigBoned: nope, you get that by flashing your tits and sucking clyde’s nonexistent dick. 

Hecan’thearyou: you saw my dick! You know it’s huge. 

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: I don’t even want to know. 

BigBoned: I’m not a fag. 

Hecan’thearyou: it’s not gay if you say no homo. 

RedRacer: It’s not Homosexual, it’s homiesexual. Get it right. 

Coffeaddict: baby stop. 

BigBoned: fags. Disgusting. Everyone here is just sucking each other off and I’m not here for it. Screw you guys. I’m going home. 

-BigBoned has left the chat- 

McDreidel: damn, Craig and Tweek are the real Cartman repealars. Nice to know.


	2. Road Trip?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids try to plan a nice spring break, which soon ends in multiple arguments and a long drive. 
> 
> Next chapter will be an actual chapter. Not text format.

Hecan’thearyou: homies. Spring break is coming up, and we need to do something cool as fucc. 

StanTheMan: I’m here for it. What should we do? 

McDreidel: No zip lining

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: or Hawaii

McLongDick: let’s go somewhere cheep. 

RedRacer: do we have to do anything at all? 

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: Nichole and I already had things planned. 

Nich.Dan: We were planing on taking a road trip.

Hecan’thearyou: wait, we should all go on a road trip!!

Nich.Dan: this was suppose to be a week long date between Token and I. 

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: Baby, it’s okay. Let them join. It’ll be fun!!

Nich.Dan: K. 

StanTheMan: ooo, someone’s in trouble tonight

McDreidel: Says the guy who was just yelled at by his boyfriend for trying to fight a bird. 

StanTheMan: he was squaring up at me! 

McDreidel: He was trying to walk past you!

StanTheMan: sure. Take the birds side

McDreidel: you’re impossible. 

Hecan’thearyou: dumbasses. Stop sucking each other off for one second to talk about this trip. Now who is in for the road trip?

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: I’m in, that is if I’m not grounded! 

McLongDick: I’m only going if there will be hot chicks, or stan’s Mom there. 

StanTheMan: I hate you. 

McLongDick: I hate myself too. You ain’t special. 

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters: Ken, you shouldn’t hate yourself. That’s not very cash money of you. 

McDreidel: and on that note.... I’m going to go pack for the road trip.

StanTheMan: Butters. If you want to come on this road trip. Never say that again. 

McLongDick: aw come on Stan, that’s not every cash money of you. 

Hecan’thearyou: you aren’t being very Mo Bomba 

RedRacer: you aren’t being gay enough 

Coffeeaddict: Hetero. 

StanTheMan: I’m going to go pack. 

RedRacer: did you mean: eat some puspus 

StanTheMan: I’m not going on the trip anymore. 

Hecan’thearyou: nope not allow. 

McLongDick: this is a friendship trip, everyone goes- or you die. 

StanTheMan: I much rather die. 

Ican’tbelieveit’snotButters!: no death. That’s not cash money. 

StanTheMan: .... 

-StanTheMan has left the chat- 

McLongDick: what a pussy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I’m hoping everyone is enjoying this story so far, there really isn’t a plot so far; it’s just a lot of random thoughts of mine jumbled together on a page.  
> But besides that, I do have ideas for future chapters, that I’m sure you will all love.  
> Also! I am very unoriginal, so if any of y’all have any request for future fluff, angst, or whatever; you are more than welcome to comment them!!


	3. New story

Hey guys! I just posted a new short story entitled ‘Castle Upon the Hill’, so please go read it and give it some love!   
Also I am working on the next chapter for this story and it should hopefully be out by tomorrow.   
Until then, I love y’all, and wish you all, a happy Mardi Gras!!


	4. We never should have went on a road trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the start of a wonderful road trip. What could possibly go wrong? 
> 
> Well, one blown out tire, two kids with car sickness, and three ran over birds may have the answer for you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter jumps from texting format, to written story, and then back to texting format. If you like the story going along this way, please tell me!!

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: okay everyone, today is the day! Please meet me at my house by twelve so we can get this shit on the road!!

RedRacer: who is all going on this trip again? 

McDreidel: I think it’s, Me, Stan, you, Tweek, Jimmy, Token, Clyde, Nichole, Bebe, Wendy, Kenny, and Butters. 

Icantbelieveit’snotButters: wait Jimmy is coming? And he isn’t in this chat?? How rude. 

-crazycrippled has been added in the chat- 

Crazycrippled: hey! Now two blondes and a fascist walked into a bar. 

McDreidel: not yet Jim. I need to add Stan back. 

Crazycrippled: [or you can just leave him for me.]  
/message has been deleted/ 

McDreidel: what was that Jim,

Crazycrippled: the end of the joke. They all banged and killed the us government. Now add in Stan.

-StanTheMan has been added back to the chat- 

StanTheMan: fuck. 

Xx.Wendy.xX: guys I’m sorry. 

RedRacer: about??

Xx.Wendy.xX: fatass is coming on the trip. 

Hecan’thearus: you had one job. Not to let Cartman know! 

HeHasHisAirpodsIn: can we just send him home? 

StanTheMan: we tried that once before. It didn’t work. Instead I got beat with a stick as Cartman cried. 

CoffeeAddict: I don’t want to be beaten with a stick!! 

RedRacer: no one is going to beat you with a stick honey. I’ll make sure of it. 

-Cartmaan.Bra has joined the chat- 

Cartmaan.Bra: oh dudes this trip is going to be totally tits. 

Xx.Wendy.xX: God I hope. Welp, I’ll see everyone there. Bye!!

 

Finally, the clock read twelve o’clock in the afternoon, and all the kids were jumbled together on Token’s front lawn. Some were trying their hardest to pack all their luggage into the newly rented 15-seater van, or the ‘perv moble’ as Cartman calls it, while the rest of the gang helped Token go over a check list for the trip. 

“Are you sure we have everything Toke? I still feel as if we’re forgetting something major here.” Kyle asked token, for what seemed to be the twelfth time in an hour period. Kyle was a worrier, so asking these type of questions multiple times in one hour was his specialty. “We have the water bottles, snacks, trash bags, suit cases, hotel journal, credit cards, and our twleve passengers. We have everything Kyle.” Token read off his small mental check list, completely sure that they had everything ready for a perfect road trip. 

Although Token was a hundred percent sure they had everything they needed, they were missing one big item on that list, which happened to be a certain raven haired boy who decided to sleep in way too late that morning.  
Originally, the group did have twleve passengers, but since Eric decided to invite himself last second, their number bumped up to thirteen, although they weren’t exactly accustomed to the sudden change just yet. 

-kool kids klub-

StanTheMan: fuck. Guys I slept in, but I’m getting ready right now. Please for the love of god, do not leave without me.

[read: by no one]

“Huh, I guess we do have everything then. Okay asshats, lets get into the car and start this freakshow!” Kyle yelled out, happy with the ‘perfect’ checklist Token presented him with.  
Once everyone heard Kyle yell, they quickly pilled into the Van. Despite all of Cartman’s arguments about Jews not being able to drive, and how he didn’t want to put his life in a ginger’s hand, Kyle stills ended up being the one driving, seeing as he was the safest driver out of the entire group of friends.

It was good thirty minutes into the ride, and everything was running smoothly. No one has checked their phone once, Tweek was fast asleep on Craig’s shoulder as to calm down his car sickness, and Butters was acting like the car’s radio, singing his favorite song aloud for everyone to enjoy- even though Cartman yelled at him to stop multiple times.  
The road trip had just started, and Kyle could tell that it was going to be perfect, but he still couldn’t shake off the feeling that he was forgetting something.  
Oh well, he could just double check with Stan about everything whenever they stop at a gas station. 

“Stan!” Kyle yelled out, slamming on his breaks in the middle of an abandoned back road. Finally Kyle managed to figure out what they were missing. An extra passenger! How could he possibly forget his boyfriend, of all people, for this road trip? How fucking stupid was he? 

-Kool Kids Club- 

StanTheMan: I just left Token’s house. Nice to know you fuckers left me. Have fucking fun on the road trip, I’m going back home to get drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s the end for this chapter! I really hope y’all enjoy, but don’t worry there will be a continuance of this chapter coming out soon!


	5. We should have never went on a road trip || part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! I am so sorry for the slow update, school has been crazy but now that I’m out for the summer I should be able to update more!!

McDreidel: Babe, I am so sorry for leaving you. I don’t know what crossed my mind. Just stay at your house, and don’t drink! We’re on our way to pick you up.

Cartmaan.braa: Or we can just leave his emo fag ass at home. 

StanTheMan: Kylr ssve ut. I dint care. 

IcantBelieveItsNotButters: oh hamburgers!! I think he is already drunk. 

McDreidel: Stan please, put the bottle down, lay in your bed, and wait for us to come get you. 

StanTheMan: ni. Gu away

McDreidel: Darling please, I didn’t mean for this to happen! It was a mistake I swear!!

StanTheMan: k. 

-

Kyle felt like shit as he turned the van around, and safely sped his ass back to Stan’s house. He could have sworn his boyfriend was asleep in the backseat, but the redhead couldn’t have been more wrong.  
Yes this was all his fault, he should have done a damn roll call sheet or something, or fucking remembered there was one extra person boarding with them, but nope! He just played dumb and hoped for the best.  
As if that ever worked. 

“I think you really messed up this time Kahl. I think the emo fag is finally going to break up with you and then kill himself. It’s as simple as that.” Cartman said, believing that everything he said was the truest statement anyone has ever heard.  
Each time Cartman even thought about opening his mouth, everyone around him prepped themselves for the worst comment ever, but for once, Kyle actually believed a bit of the bullshit Cartman was spewing out.  
Stan was going to break up with him.  
Kyle truly messed up big time, and he was sure he wasn’t getting a second chance for the fifth time. 

“Stan is going to break up with me.” Kyle mumbled to himself, speeding past cars, not paying much attention to the road. All he cared about was his relationship with Stan ending. It’s impeccable death was hanging above Kyle’s head and he couldn’t fucking ignore it anymore.  
Stan was going to break up with him. 

-Kool Kids Klub-

ICantBelieveItsNotButters: hiya Stan!! We’re at your house now. I think Kyle was going to come get you but he’s a little frozen now. 

RedRacer: it’s like he’s terrified right now. What a pussy. 

StanTheMan: I’m nit ciming iut. In staying hime. 

McDreidle: Stan please come down, or Clyde, Token, and I will come get you. 

StanTheMan: Fuck off. 

Hecanthearyou: wait. I have to get out? 

HeHasHisAirPodsIn: we need to get stan, Clyde. Come on. 

Hecanthearyou: ughhh fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter should be the last or second to last part of the road trip saga!! Thank you for reading and please leave a kudos and comment if you liked it!!


End file.
